Men and Orgasm
One type of sexual dysfunction in man is delayed ejaculation or failure to climax. This can be a serious problem, both physically and emotionally. Women exhibit no overt signs of orgasm and can fake it. Men can’t. Men with this problem should know they are not alone, this is not as uncommon as you may think. There is help available.
Men are uncomfortable discussing sexual dysfunction because it is often tied closely to their self image or esteem. Failure in sexual intercourse can have a negative impact on a man’s perception of himself, his confidence. The problem is complex and may be caused by physical or psychological issues. The result of this condition are physical and can include discomfort or pain and can even cause damage if left untreated. In men the effects of a sexual failure can be cumulative, one failure leads to another. A sexual partner who is not understanding and supportive can complicate the situation.
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The first step to solving the problem is to determine whether it is physical. If a man can reach orgasm with self stimulation (masturbation), but not with a partner, or if he can reach orgasm with a partner and not through self stimulation, the problem is probably psychological. If a man cannot reach orgasm at all, and if the problem is a relatively recent one, he should seek medical attention imm ediately. The delayed ejaculation may be a symptom of a physical problem or disease. This could be serious and only a qualified medical doctor can make the diagnosis.
There are men who have perfectly normal responses when engaging in sex with a partner, but are unable to achieve orgasm through self stimulation (masturbation). Again, the problem may have to do with religious taboos. Many Christian sects in particular, have strong taboos regarding masturbation. The guilt created by these taboos can cause men to be inhibited about their sexual responses. Just as guilt can result in a lack of sexual response for women, it can easily have the same dampening effect on men.
Trained mental health professionals can help men get over their em barrassment regarding their problem and help them find the cause. This is not a problem that a can can address without help. If left untreated, this particular dysfunction can lead to serious physical problems. Find a therapist with whom you feel comfortable discussing your sexual issues.
If a man is married or has a regular sexual partner, the therapist will probably want to work with the man and woman as a couple. Sexual therapists can ease the guilt over sexual taboos and teach the couple ways to express their love through physical touching and erotic stimulation. Creating an intimate setting can help set the mood for both partners. Relaxation leads to decreased inhibitions and can help in creating an accepting, non judgmental atmosphere. Taking time to demonstrate affection without pressure to perform is technique that can lead to improved sexual enjoyment.
In addition to treatment, there are exercises that men can practice to strengthen the pubococcygeus muscle. Training of the muscle promotes control over ejaculation. The Penis Health Program has instructions for exercises that can promote sexual pleasure for men and their partners.
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